Washington, D.C.: Moments after being let go as Chief Strategist to Donald Trump, former Breitbart executive chair Steve Bannon could be seen ambling naked onto the White House lawn, ornate dagger in hand, eventually kneeling in front of the fence separating him and passers-by on the street. His skin covered in red magic marker with such names as George Wallace, Orval Faubus, and Strom Thurmond, Bannon began speaking indecipherable gibberish, raising the blade, knife down, before bellowing “Economic chaos!” at no one in particular.
Plunging the knife into ground several times, Bannon, a smile crawling across his pocked face, chanted repeatedly, “I did it for you, Donald! I did it all for you! My life for you! Cibola! Cibola!”
Moments later, the Secret Service tazed the red-faced champion of the alt-right, dragging his unconscious body, reportedly reeking of pure-grain alcohol, off the White House premises.